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Post by Panther on Aug 26, 2003 10:34:18 GMT -5
Oh Lisa I really feel aweful for you and what you went throu. And for the police to do what they did is unforgiving. How could they have been so mean to treat someone like that when they wasn't doing anything wrong and to do that in front of their child. I would difintaly press charges on them and leave the husband. I will pray for you. Please continue to post and let us know whats going on. And do remember you do have friends on this board and I would like very much to be included in that list. I know I just started to talk to you and don't know you very well yet but I hope that changes. So God Bless and take care for now. Alison Alison, What a sweetheart you are! I appreciate that very much and would like to be friends too. I have been trying to keep up in the fellowship forum, but it's hard, I have been kinda short on time and there are SO many posts to read. I have found it is easier to post here on this site about this issue, but will hang out in the other one too soon. It's very interesting! Thank you for taking the time to look for my thread too! |
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Post by Panther on Aug 26, 2003 10:44:31 GMT -5
Lisa, I'm so sorry for what happened to you. It must have been horrible, and for your daughter to see it all...you and your family are in my prayers. How long were you with your husband before you married him, if you don't mind me asking? I read your first post on the worn out parents thread and you sounded so happy to be married! And now, to come to this point - I'm so sorry. I hope you can get things straightened up, and definitely pursue filing charges against the cops who did this. That is terrible. YSIC, Jaime Hi Jamie! Yes, I was sooo happy. Thought God answered my prayers and everything. I had known Dan personally as a good friend for about 3-4 years before we got romantic. We dated off and on for less than a year, but since we had been such good friends, I thought I knew him well enough. In between, there were times that I broke it off with Dan. I had divorced my first husband, then me and Dan started hanging out together after that. However, I still love my ex dearly, so there were times that I told Dan that I needed my space, that I still loved Wayne and was considering trying to reconcile with him. So Wayne and I tried to get back together a few times. But this new love interest was so fresh with Dan. It was easier for me to go to Dan and stop trying to work out the problems with Wayne. After all, there were no problems with Dan at that point and I thought I was falling in love. Looking back, I think if Dan had not been in the picture, my ex and I probably would have made it. |
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Post by Panther on Aug 26, 2003 10:48:52 GMT -5
Wow,, they were only together a month?? sounds like a pattern was developing... I'm glad that you didn't have to deal with him yesterday, but keep being strong for you will again have to face him sometime !!!! Oh my story isn't really that violent or anything, i did post a prayer request on the other board about a letter i had sent on a trip w/my ex !!!! We were married for 23 yrs (together over 25)..... we did the owning of a business together thing also.... He just got crazy with the "mid-life-crisis syndrome !!!! alot of hurt, and today he isn't even with the woman he left me for, just got into some heavy alcohol problems, and a huge Pride issue !!!!! I hope that today is a better day for you !!  Still sending those prayers up !!! YSIC, heart2heart Hi, Where is your prayer request so I can read it? Are you and your ex going to be able to work things out? Oh, the dreaded mid-life crisis! Hopefully he has come to his senses now---do you want to reconcile? It is difficult when you have been with someone SOOO long. For me, met my ex when I was 16. We married when I was 19 and were married almost 15 years! When I married Dan, Wayne was soooo jealous. He STILL wanted me back. It broke his heart and everything. I felt bad, didn't mean to hurt him. I guess when you have been with someone that long, they ARE your best friend, hard to imagine never talking to them again, know what I mean? |
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Post by Panther on Aug 26, 2003 10:50:28 GMT -5
[glow=purple,20,300]
Matthew 21:22 And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive.
[/glow]You are always in my prayers. Thank you sister, as always, for praying for me. With love, Lisa |
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Post by kenosis on Aug 26, 2003 10:59:09 GMT -5
Thank you sister, as always, for praying for me. With love, Lisa
I pray for you in this because the advice I give from me personally does not always help - I have been through a lot but what I did (or would do) might not be whats best for you.
If you followed that train of thought you get a prize - I just type from my heart and sometimes it comes out all at once. LOL
But I love you and know this - God has your best interest in mind and he will be there for you - ALWAYS.
love you sister, Vada |
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Post by Panther on Aug 26, 2003 11:06:41 GMT -5
An update!
I went to Orlando for a few days and got back last night. I see where Dan tried to get into my house, the window screen was laying on the ground below my kitchen window. Luckily, nothing was disturbed inside so I know he was not able to get in. I almost didn't go to Orlando, even though I go every year to this particular convention with my friend, but I prayed to God that my house would be safe and undisturbed. I had put it in God's hands.
Wayne, my ex, told me a few days ago that he knew Dan was not right for me. He told me this before, but I didn't know that he was going to church and praying about this. Apparently, he talked to our pastor for a half hour one night, in private prayer that I would not stay with Dan. He also prayed that God would watch over me and our daughter, Chelsea, that we be safe.
Dan led me to believe he was a Christian and that we shared the same beliefs. Then one night during discussion, he told me he believed in God, but not Jesus and that he held absolutely no stock in the bible b/c it was written by man. My stomach dropped at this point and I was very sad that I misunderstood him prior and thought he believed the same as me. It made me sick. I feel like he misled me.
The power of prayer is awesome. When I noticed things were not right with Dan, I started praying myself that God step in and do HIS will in this area. Then all this happened.
I have not heard from Dan at all. I am starting the dissolution process today. My attorney wanted $1500 for this simple dissolution, I told him I could not afford that at this time. The friend that I went to Orlando with, Karen, has LOTS of legal background, so she is going to guide me through the process. I probably will only have to spend a couple hundred to file this. Attorneys are so expensive.
I have to see an attorney about the assult matter too. It's not "charged" yet, meaning if I get the right attorney, this can be thrown out before anything happens. Then I can go after the police for the brutal treatment I got. I just hate all this legal stuff though. I am not used to it AT ALL!
Wayne and I are getting along wonderfully. We have forgiven each other and are trying to heal. Let's see what happens!
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Post by kenosis on Aug 26, 2003 11:17:51 GMT -5
An update! Wayne and I are getting along wonderfully. We have forgiven each other and are trying to heal. Let's see what happens!
This update was all good news - thank you so much for sharing. But this that I quoted was really good news in that God is in the family and healing business - there is no telling what God can do when we believe!!
Love to you in Christ Jesus, Vada |
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Post by Alison on Aug 26, 2003 12:35:44 GMT -5
Thanks Lisa for the update. It sounds like things well work out for you. Just remember to keep on trusting in the Lord for help, specially in the times that seem to be to much for you to handle. You are in my thoughts and prayers, as well as your daughter.
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Post by Panther on Aug 26, 2003 13:17:23 GMT -5
This update was all good news - thank you so much for sharing. But this that I quoted was really good news in that God is in the family and healing business - there is no telling what God can do when we believe!!
Love to you in Christ Jesus, VadaBoy Vada, are you ever right! EVERY time I turn my will over to God, He makes things happen! He is a mover and a shaker! ;D Sometimes they don't always go in the way I would like, but the outcome is always what is the best. That is why we should give to God all that bothers us, let Him take our problems and do HIS will for us. I am such a firm believer in this. As far as my upcoming divorce, if the unbeliever leaves...........  Vada, my sister, I hope you are doing well and I think of you often! Hugs, Lisa |
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Post by JaimeNat on Aug 26, 2003 15:19:18 GMT -5
I'm glad things are doing better for you Lisa. I know attorney fees are outrageous. I just thought I'd mention this to you - when I went through my custody battle with my oldest son's father, I was still in college and couldn't afford a lawyer. I don't know if you have a major university near you that has a law school, but I live near WVU, so they have 3rd year law students act as attorneys for free. They work under an actual lawyer who has pkmtyolped the bar, but they do most of the work, and it doesn't cost a penny. So you might want to look into that, it worked out very well for me.
You're in my prayers!!
Jaime
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Post by Panther on Aug 27, 2003 7:45:31 GMT -5
I'm glad things are doing better for you Lisa. I know attorney fees are outrageous. I just thought I'd mention this to you - when I went through my custody battle with my oldest son's father, I was still in college and couldn't afford a lawyer. I don't know if you have a major university near you that has a law school, but I live near WVU, so they have 3rd year law students act as attorneys for free. They work under an actual lawyer who has pkmtyolped the bar, but they do most of the work, and it doesn't cost a penny. So you might want to look into that, it worked out very well for me. You're in my prayers!! Jaime Wow, I was not aware of this, thank you for the info! Blessings |
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Post by CMAC on Aug 31, 2003 1:52:23 GMT -5
Wow, I was not aware of this, thank you for the info! Blessings OK for simple, uncontested stuff. Anything that is complicated or contested, my opinion is that third year law students are not capable of handling it. Law school is 90 percent law and about ten percent procedure. The practice of law is about ten percent law and 90 percent procedure. |
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Post by BlindFaith on Aug 31, 2003 13:52:56 GMT -5
LISA, you poooor thing!!! I have no good advice other than to get a darn good lawyer and PRAY. I am praying for you? How is your daughter in all of this?
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Post by Ben johnson on Sept 1, 2003 3:20:39 GMT -5
Wow. A lotta wisdom that's been learned in this, I guarantee; hope it can influence someone else --- to save grief. Obviously he is not; "you will know them by their fruits. No good tree produces bad, no bad tree produces good." I second the idea that you should file charges against the police; definitely use the photos, and subpeona any neighbors who saw the incident --- with all the cops' cars there is NO CHANCE that they all didn't. Subpeona will force them to testify. The hardest thing you will need to do, is to forgive Dan. NOT the kind of forgiveness that absolves him from his crime, but the kind that releases YOU from the anger. Releases you, and gives him over to God --- for punishment, or for forgiveness if he repents at some time in the future, it becomes no-longer-your-concern. If you hold the anger inside, you will allow Dan to hurt you again and again. Dan is driving at high speed --- towards the very gates of Hell. What will the things that he has stolen be worth as he falls through those glowing-iron-gates? NOTHING. And yet, that same fate awaits us --- if not for Jesus' sacrifice! I hope you can find it in your heart to pray for Dan's salvation; because THAT will move you far closer to the woman God wants you to be. Once you RELEASE what he did to you (which is no small request), then you are free to pray for his salvation. Salvation coming only from a broken and humbled heart. Forgive me for "dissing" my gender, but I hope you get a "GIRL-ATTORNEY". I think she will be far more sensitive to your case. And far more flexible in charges. I'll pray for you and your situation. Your physical wounds will heal, and perhaps you and Wayne together have changed enough for a strong re-marriage. If you do, then spend time with him, before God, in prayer and worship; go to a Christian bookstore and buy some structured Bible studies, and work on them with your husband. I know you'll find that it promotes incredible emotional intimacy. God bless you, and keep you and yours, Lisa. He may not be in control of all the little things, now; but someday soon He's gonna come back... |
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Post by Panther on Sept 1, 2003 10:28:23 GMT -5
Wow. A lotta wisdom that's been learned in this, I guarantee; hope it can influence someone else --- to save grief. Obviously he is not; "you will know them by their fruits. No good tree produces bad, no bad tree produces good." I second the idea that you should file charges against the police; definitely use the photos, and subpeona any neighbors who saw the incident --- with all the cops' cars there is NO CHANCE that they all didn't. Subpeona will force them to testify. The hardest thing you will need to do, is to forgive Dan. NOT the kind of forgiveness that absolves him from his crime, but the kind that releases YOU from the anger. Releases you, and gives him over to God --- for punishment, or for forgiveness if he repents at some time in the future, it becomes no-longer-your-concern. If you hold the anger inside, you will allow Dan to hurt you again and again. Dan is driving at high speed --- towards the very gates of Hell. What will the things that he has stolen be worth as he falls through those glowing-iron-gates? NOTHING. And yet, that same fate awaits us --- if not for Jesus' sacrifice! I hope you can find it in your heart to pray for Dan's salvation; because THAT will move you far closer to the woman God wants you to be. Once you RELEASE what he did to you (which is no small request), then you are free to pray for his salvation. Salvation coming only from a broken and humbled heart. Forgive me for "dissing" my gender, but I hope you get a "GIRL-ATTORNEY". I think she will be far more sensitive to your case. And far more flexible in charges. I'll pray for you and your situation. Your physical wounds will heal, and perhaps you and Wayne together have changed enough for a strong re-marriage. If you do, then spend time with him, before God, in prayer and worship; go to a Christian bookstore and buy some structured Bible studies, and work on them with your husband. I know you'll find that it promotes incredible emotional intimacy. God bless you, and keep you and yours, Lisa. He may not be in control of all the little things, now; but someday soon He's gonna come back... What a beautiful post! Thank you, thank you. I have a lot to add now that more time has pkmtyolped. In short, my ex and I are reconciling. This is good news. I will fill in the story soon. Am leaving to go to the beach today for the holiday. Me, my ex and our daughter. Ben, you are always so kind and insightful and I love hearing what you have to say. I would like to talk to you more soon. God Bless you Lisa |
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